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r-remember how i just said i was semi stable...
well, i'm not..
i just checked my notifs..
my boyfriend deactivated...
and i have really no other way to talk to him...
guess thats one way to say its over..

so...if you'll excuse me, i'll be trying to think of any reason not to kill myself..

Devious Comments

:iconnothingbutkai:
NothingButKai Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017
Dude are you fucking serious!? There's the fucking reason why I messaged you 4 TIMES on this!!! I'm getting all sorta of fucking abuse on other social media accounts man from your friends calling me all sorts! For fuck sake check your Notes for just once in your life!
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
you...i thought you already left me..
why are you back...?
i mean, i want you to stay, but you clearly dont want to...
you probably only came back because you dont want to feel like you'd be the reason if i killed myself..
Reply
:iconnothingbutkai:
NothingButKai Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017
Wtf? When did I say I was leaving you? No I didn't say I was leaving you at all. I just made a new account because my other account was a mess.
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
well you didnt tell me, so i figured you just left me...
Reply
:iconnothingbutkai:
NothingButKai Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017
I DID! I MESSAGED YOU THE MOMENT I MADE IT! PLUS YOU WERE IGNORING ME ON THE LAST ONE SO HOW COULD I? Jesus man...
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
i wasnt ignoring you, i told you i got off to do art cause my dad was coming home..
Reply
:iconnothingbutkai:
NothingButKai Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017
*sigh* you were on at the time and talking. I'm just gonna put this behind us but I'm still pissed off with all the targeting I was getting and shit. I am not happy about that. Plus you can easily message me on the Wii u.
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
dude, i was on the pc at home.
plus i had to go anyway, he was coming home.
i cant talk on the pc, remember?
i was on the comp till like, 11. which is 4am for you.
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconfangwolfsbane:
FangWolfsbane Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm really sorry dude :( here if you need to talk
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:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
thanks..*sad hug*
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:iconfangwolfsbane:
FangWolfsbane Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
hey, you alright?
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:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
yeah, i'm fine now, i sent that earlier today.
he andi are fine now. ^^
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:iconfangwolfsbane:
FangWolfsbane Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
that's good :)
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
hehe, but do me a favor, check my last status, i think it was.
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:iconfangwolfsbane:
FangWolfsbane Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
just saw it. Good to hear :)
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2017  Student General Artist
so yeah, i appreciate you defending me, but please dont witch hunt him again...
i dont know if he exaggerated or not, it sometimes happens in stories like these, but assuming he didnt,
it was kind of rude to say 'your kind'...

of course, its over now, but for the future, please dont unless i give the okay. ^^ still, that said, i'm glad you felt like you needed to defend me. but please ask next time ^^
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icondantekizu:
DanteKizu Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Go. See. A. Doctor. Nobody on here is a psychologist it's the wrong place to go for help ;w; suicidal thoughts are an illness, and require treatment just like any other illness
Reply
:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Student General Artist
dude...
just.
i dont do doctors.
i dont talk about my problems...
i only do it here because i have the anonymity.
even with friends, i dont talk about it, but i can text.
just..
its weird but its how i am.
and even if i went to a doctor they'd just give me pills and i cannot physically swallow pills.
so.
a doctor couldnt help anyway.
and dont suggest therapy, because thats a whole can of worms we shouldnt get into.

my therapy was him...and now i'm alone again like the pathetic shit i am. i shoul have known...
Reply
:icondantekizu:
DanteKizu Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Dude. Going to a doctor or therapy is a hell of alot better/easier than living another 70 years thinking about dying, or even worse actually dying.
Not being able to swallow a pill is a shitty excuse to let yourself die or let others panic about you. Crush them up if you have to. And if therapy opens up a whole other can of worms then thats 100× more reason you need to do it.
I'm sorry if I'm coming of harsh here, but I'm sick as shit of my friends dying after I beg the shit out of them to get help. Illness = treatment = all better. It's so simple, why would you choose to be at risk of dying just because "you don't do doctors"
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:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Student General Artist
because i just dont care anymore...
i appreciate that you care about me, for whatever reason it is that you do..
but i'm stubborn, and i just dont care...
so...
the only thing that will get me feeling better is if he comes back...
which is like, 90% not gonna happen..
probably..
Reply
:icondantekizu:
DanteKizu Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Not caring is part of the illness, if you got treatment you would care and you would be happy, why would you not want to be happy?
Nobody should be the source of your happiness, that's called character dependency disorder and is a whole other illness that you need help for.
But begging you to go see someone is all I can do. If I were anywhere near you I'd drag your ass to a doctor even if you were hitting me or biting me.
Happiness is a choice, and it's sitting right there, all you have to do is reach out and take it. If not for yourself then for me ;w;

I won't pester you about it anymore~
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:iconscribblyskiesstudios:
ScribblySkiesStudios Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Student General Artist
*sigh*
and for the record, if you or anyone forced me to a doctor for any reason, whatsoever, they'd be dead to me for all eternity and beyond.
even if i was bleeding out and dying.
so please dont say that, i'd hate for you to turn to that for me...
i guess what i selfishly expect is just someone to vent to..
ah well, i'll have that whenever my other friend gets on..
Reply
:icondantekizu:
DanteKizu Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Any decent human being would force a sick person to see a doctor, even if it was at risk of being hated. Id rather you hate me than have your death on my conscience for the rest of my life.

And someone to vent to, is what ive been trying to tell you to get. That's what therapists are for. Venting to someone with no pshycological degree is dangerous.

But you're obviously not mature enough to make adult decisions. I'm wasting my time here, I'm not going to sit around and watch you talk about wanting to die when you have no intention to get help, its an insult to people that have really taken their lives.
I hope you find your happiness.
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